Literary Love
by Hoshiguma-douji
Summary: Suika and Patchouli go on a date.
1. Chapter 1

The Voile Library is massive. Books are crammed together on towering bookshelves, all categorized alphabetically but disorganized nonetheless.

I drag my finger along the books' spines in search in search for yet another book on Shuten-douji. I wish I could pull a Marisa and smuggle these five books out without Patchouli knowing that I'm researching myself, but before I can even entertain the idea, she find me.

"An oni in a library. How strange," Patchouli says, making me jump and drop my book.

"Hello, Patchy-chan," I say cheerfully, glancing at the book that fell. I swallow as I see her violet eyes land on it.

She picks it up and scans the corner. "I always thought Remi was a narcissist, but I doubt even she would read books on herself."

"Oh, she does," I inform the librarian. "On her species in general, anyway."

Patchouli's lips curl into a small, amused smile, and she hands me the book. "Since when did you gain an interest in reading?"

"Since Reimu-san told me that there's more to life than sex and sake."

"There are plenty of books to choose from," Patchouli continues. "Why read about yourself? You should know the story of Shuten-douji better than anyone. Besides, you oni are escapists. I'd assume reading something more like 50 Shades of Grey would be more up your alley than," she reads the title of the book on top of my stack, "An Objective Analysis of the Shuten-douji Story."

I cross my arms. "You think I'm stupid, don't you."

"I wouldn't lie to you…yes."

I make an irritated throat sound at her, but to lighten the mood, I say, "Besides, 50 Shades of Grey is more of Yuugi's style. I don't torture my lovers with a Room of Pain."

Patchouli hesitates. "The Shuten-douji legend would argue that."

I snort, which turns into a hiccup, followed by laughter.

"So…you didn't eat women?"

"Oh, I did. I just don't anymore. Unless if you want to go to a restaurant, because then, we could eat out."

Patchouli rolls her eyes and tries to look unimpressed with my flirting, but gives in and laughs. Once she finally calms her giggles, she says, "I'm single."

I blink rapidly. "Wait, what?"

Patchouli sighs. "I'm single, so we can…eat out…"

"Right here? Ohoho…I guess the rumors about librarians are true…"

"Shut up! I want to go on a date with you before we do…that."

"A date?" I shuffle my feet. "What do you want to do?"

Patchouli shrugs. "I'm fine with just the two of us drinking and talking. You're interesting. I guess it was stupid of me to get caught up in your image of being silly."

"I am silly. There's just more to me than that." With that, I give her a hug.

I'm not trying to hold her tightly, but she squirms and coughs. "It…hurts…"

I pull back. "You're a fragile little thing, aren't you."

She scoffs. "I'm taller than you."

"Yeah, I get that a lot. So anyway, why don't we start now?"

"Our date? Right now?"

"I don't like waiting."

"I don't like dating in Remi's house."

"Oh. Let's walk to mine, then."

"isn't it far?"

"Not really. If you get tired, I can carry you. Besides, you're gonna spend the night, right? I wanna see that librarian nymphomania."

Patchouli's cheeks turn pink. "If anyone's a nymphomaniac, it's you."

"I don't dispute that. I love sex."

"I wouldn't know," Patchouli murmurs, fixing her eyes on the hem of my dress.

I grin, pick up my books with one arm, and take her arm with the other. "I can show you the joys later…"


	2. Chapter 2

I didn't expect Patchouli to be overly talkative, but I was surprised by her silence. It was beautiful outside, with the blue skies and shining sun and perfect temperature for a dinner party, the sort of environment people have nice conversations in.

But she didn't say a word. She simply walked alongside me, looking a little irritated at something I couldn't detect. I'm bad at nonverbal cues.

"So how's life?" I ask her cheerfully to break the awkwardness.

"You tell me," she says softly. "I don't get out much."

I rack my brain to try to find something interesting. I don't think I'd be too interesting to someone like Patchouli. I read a lot, but I spend a lot more time exerting myself and partying. "Dan Brown wrote his own version of Dante's Inferno," I say finally.

Her eyes light up. "Did you read it yet?"

"I'm just hoping he doesn't ruin it. I loved the original."

"Oh, it was brilliant." She smiles a gorgeous smile that makes my heart flutter. "But I'm sure you're biased, since you used to live in Hell."

"Just Old Hell," I reply. "I'm not all oriented with the other levels. Doesn't seem like a fun vacation spot to me."

She laughs, only I don't know why. She hasn't been in Hell before, and if she had, she wouldn't be laughing; it isn't a funny place.

"But the Ancient City's pretty cool," I say. "Since I'm still friends with the oni there, I drop by occasionally."

"Maybe you could take me with you."

I stop walking and turn to look at her. "Seriously?"

"It'd be interesting."

Now it's my turn to laugh. "I don't think you'd last."

"Try me!" But she's laughing to the point she's wheezing. I can't help but find her cute when she does that, showing her weakness in her merriment. She'd make a fine oni if she wasn't so sickly.

"I will take you to my place. It's very interesting there." I tell her once our laughter dies down.

"I think you're more interesting than your house," she says in a more serious tone. "I really want to know your side to the Shuten-douji myth."

I pinch myself. "I'm not a myth! I'm here!"

"No, the story. Obviously, the story isn't how it really happened, and since oni don't lie, it'd be best to ask the oni herself."

We've approached the Hakurei Shrine at this point. Reimu isn't there; she's out with Marisa, doing whatever it is they do when they hang out outside of the shrine.

"Wait." Patchouli stops. "I thought you were taking me to your house."

"This is like my second home. There's no way we're walking to up there!" Then I laugh. "Besides, I'll take you there soon enough."

She sighs and rolls her eyes before laughing. "You're such a pervert..."

I smile at Patchouli. "Don't worry. I'll wait for that. I'll heat us up some sake and we'll discuss my life story, then!"


End file.
